My Grown Up Boy with His Little

Some would first notice his long hair. Some would first notice his thin frame and clothes not from a designer rack. What I see is that plaque under one arm that states “matched one whole year” and under the other arm that smiling little boy.

After meeting him and talking a bit, some would see a young man slow to launch still working two jobs, still in college. I see a boy who is figuring out life well, giving back before he has anything to give.

After talking to him for awhile some would see that he does not fit in with the main stream crowd and will probably not earn a six figure income some day, but who am I to Project? This kid has many hidden talents that he has not tapped into yet! What I do know is that I see a young man of compassion and commitment. I see a man building a relationship with a another future young man– a man who took the time when he didn’t have to take the time to get involved. He did it not for any merit for himself, but for another human being through the Big Brothers Program in Bloomington, Indiana.

I am a proud mama right now. To raise a son who has compassion for others — priceless! I love all three of my boys to pieces. First born, I am proud of you!

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Good Good Father

I gave a talk at a women’s retreat this weekend and we sang a song called Good Good Father. It is easy to know that your Father God is good when your Earthly father is nothing but kind and loving. I am thankful for and admire men who are the reflection of the Good Good Father– men who keep their vows and commitments, love their wives and children, pay their child support, keep their visitation dates with their kids……. but most of all who choose to follow the Good Good Father who created us all.

I have no excuse to be anything but kind and loving because of the love poured out to me by the men in my life.
An Uncle
A brother-in-law
A father-in-law
Family friends
And especially my husband and my own good good father.

I was surrounded by so many broken hearts this weekend– broken relationships. We are all broken people. What I learned was that fathers have the power to change the world, not perfect fathers, but fathers who are present in their children’s lives. Fathers who show up.

Mothers are so important. I am one. I know my role is important. It is so much easier for a girl to know she has worth when the father in her life treats her like a precious gem.

Thirty minutes before I gave my talk at this retreat, my precious mom whom I adore handed me a necklace from my father– an act of love that tells me I have worth. I am forever grateful for my earthly Good Good Father.

To all: you have a Good Good Father
He created you and loves you. You just have to believe it.

Psalm 139:13-14
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

Thank you for my necklace, Dad! I love you!
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Coach

Coach

My family celebrated my mom’s 80th birthday this weekend in Nashville, TN. It was my mom’s idea because my mom is fun. She is a grandma of 4 grandsons. She is the mom of two daughters. She is the wife of one husband.

My mom is a fairly private person about her own childhood. That is because it was not picture perfect. What I will share are the words I would use to describe her mother (my grandma) — loving, kind, strong, independent, steadfast, role model, survivor. I do not have any words for her father. I do not know him. From what I hear, he was not a nice man. I call my mom and her two siblings silent survivors because all three emerged from a childhood of tension to become people who are loving and kind. I have always admired my mom for her lack of bitterness towards her own father. I’m sure she would tell me it is her Heavenly Father who fills that gap. My mom is a woman of strong faith in Jesus.

If you look at my mom’s high school and college year books you will see pictures of her as a cheerleader — a role she carried on into her adult life as she married a man who for decades was a high school basketball coach. Most people think of her as that cheerleader sitting in that basketball gym in the stands, and in many ways that is how I see her — an encourager in the stands of my life always cheering me on.

But I’m sure my dad would agree with me, my mom ain’t sitting on no sidelines just cheering us on. (My mom was a high school grammar teacher. That is going to make her cringe! Lol) My mom IS our coach.

I would call her my life coach. She wore the whistle in our family. My mom is the best of any good coach who pushes her players and tries to get the best out of them. My dad and sister I know would agree with me, we are who we are today because of our mom. Words to describe my mom are the same ones that I used to describe her mother — loving, kind, strong, independent, steadfast, role model, survivor. I can only hope that someone will say those words about me some day. I am fortunate to have been coached by the best.

Connie Milhollland, you are dearly loved by this family. Every day you cheer us on, we want you to know we are grateful for you, Coach!

Love you always,
Your Team

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All My Sisters and Me

img_2310“We are family….. I’ve got all my sisters and me!” Well, actually I just have one younger sister, but she means the world to me. If you take a close look at the picture of the two of us, you can see she was the favorite one. Why else would my mom put that God-awful hat on me and dress her up so cute? We have laughed about that for years. When we were growing up, she had to endure my first born dominance of hogging the bathroom, bossing her around, and can I just admit to all. I did tickle her until she wet her pants. I think that was sort-of a form of torture. She wasn’t laughing. She has forgiven me and has become a treasure in my life. …And I have forgiven my mom for the hat!

I have three boys who I have watched wrestle, tease, and fight over their growing up years. However, I do not believe there was any tickling torture in my home. I have said the prayer countless times as I watch them interact. “Please, Lord, let them be friends as adults. Let them see the gift that they are to each other.”

It warms my heart as I see that happening.

People don’t always stay close to their siblings when they are adults. It takes acceptance, understanding, and a lot of forgiveness. It takes being intentional and reaching beyond oneself. It isn’t easy, but it’s worth it.

I love my many many friends, but I have only one sister. However many you have, value them. Don’t let a gap widen in your relationship. Warm your mama’s heart. Give them a call today.

….. and don’t even get me started on cousins. I adore my cousins!

“We are family…….

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